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Tonight is the night that I hope starts me on the path to total lung destruction. Even though I have smoked in the past and still smoke cigars, tonight is different. As I walked on the beach and stood on the balcony of my room, taking in the fresh air and my lungs providing my body with oxygen, I knew that what I am about to embark upon will change that forever. The air will never smell so sweet and clean again. My lungs will never function properly ever again. After tonight and as I progress down the path to total lung destruction, emphysema, heart disease, cancer and whatever else my beloved cigarettes bring, my life will never be the same. While others, much as I did in my previous life, work to maintain a healthy hearts and lungs, I will now concentrate on increasing the number of cigarettes I smoke so that every action makes my lungs and heart work harder and harder. While those who quit look forward to renewed health, I look forward to seeing my health deteriorate. As I set on my balcony, chain smoking my Camels, filling my lungs with all the chemicals and smoke, I will feel closer to all of those that have decided to go down this path before me. I will hold that pack of Camels in my hand, shaking with anticipation as I light the first one and work my way through the entire pack, trying to smoke the entire pack in as short a period of time as possible. I want to feel my heartbeat increase and experience the burning sensation in my lungs knowing the damage starts. Damage that I do want to continue, until I am, as I desire.
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